Monday, October 20, 2014

monday thoughts.

I woke up the other morning morning with a pit in my stomach. I wanted to cry. I went through the motions of my work week routine and I felt pretty sorry for myself. I wake up so early. I work so hard. I'm always so tired. These thoughts live in my brain a lot of the time -- more often than they should, I think. I ended my morning in tears. This also happens more often than it should. Truthfully, sometimes life is hard. Really, really hard. Like, a lot harder than I ever imagined it would be. Please hear me out: this is not a complaint, it's a wake up call.

As I walked out the door, streets empty, not another soul in sight, dark as the night, it all felt a little unfair. I wanted to scream. And then, it hit me like a ton of bricks. (This is how it commonly happens.) A frying pan over the head, a punch to the gut, all those others sayings about the wind getting knocked out of you. I sometimes get into the habit of wishing away my perfectly beautiful life. I get caught up in all the  runs in the fabric and I forget to step back and take a look at the incredible, detailed, unbelievable tapestry of my human experience. Please understand that I am not shooing away the feelings I feel. It's important to have them, to evaluate them, and work toward having less not-so-good feelings and more really-great feelings.

In the meantime, I must stop waiting for what's around the bend, and I must take advantage of my life. In this moment. Happy Monday, sweet friends.

(P.S. Other posts about feelings: transitions, fueling a life, trusting your decisions, and beauty in chaos.)


  1. Thank you so much for your honesty! I'm also seeing myself struggling with similar thoughts and while I love planning for the future, I tend to forget about living and really embracing all the little moments in the present...
    Never forget, that you are not alone with your struggles...
    I'm sending you lots of good energy all the way to Florida!!

    1. Stefanie,

      You always have the most thoughtful replies to my posts -- thank you! I am also such a planner and sometimes find myself living for the future. During those times, I have to snap myself out of it and really take notice of the beauty surrounding me! Thanks for the love. xo


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